McCarthy Stone has reported a rising trend of siblings choosing to live together in its retirement communities. After decades of living apart, the UK’s leading developer and manager of retirement communities says that siblings are either choosing to move back in with one another in the same apartment, or at the very least into the same development – often to combat isolation and loneliness after a change in circumstance. In the UK, it’s estimated that 1.4 million older people are often lonely, so it's no surprise that people are more reliant on their loved ones than ever before.
In the UK, around 80% of the UK’s population have at least one sibling, and there’s much to be said about the life-long bond often forged between brothers and sisters, despite any sibling rivalry when growing up. For many, a relationship with a sibling is often their longest, pre-dating any friendships and romances, and will usually outlast the parent-child relationship, too.
As a result, the retirement housebuilder says that it has seen many siblings enjoying a multitude of benefits from taking the plunge. These include unlocking instant companionship rather than feeling isolated, improvement to health and wellbeing thanks to being able to share memories and that all important practical support by having immediate family right on your doorstep.
One brother-sister-duo doing exactly that is Jenny Hurford, 85, and Michael Lambert, 90, who both own a Retirement Living apartment opposite one another at McCarthy Stone’s Ridgeway Court in Heathfield, East Sussex.
“Mick and I have always been very close – our relationship has never been anything but love. Having him just across the hall from me has made a world of difference, especially after I lost my husband only recently,” says Jenny.
The 85-year-old, who is the youngest of six siblings, previously lived in a bungalow in Seaford with her late husband of more than 63 years, John.
“After John died, I was at sixes and sevens. I could no longer manage the upkeep of the bungalow and I felt so alone. That’s when Mick told me there was a vacant flat opposite him at Ridgeway Court, so we chatted it over with my daughter who thought it was a wonderful idea. It would mean I’d have some company – and some lovely company at that.
“Ever since I was a little girl, Mick has always taken good care of me – even now, he takes me under his wing, making sure that I’m okay. I feel like the luckiest sister alive.”
Seconding this, Mick talks about how the two have always shared a special bond.
“There’s never been any secrets between us, we tell each other everything. If ever Jen has any issues, she knows she can come to me. We’re as close now as we were when we were children - in fact, we often both say we still feel like we’re in our youth.”
Looking back on their childhood, Jenny and Mick have many a fond tale to tell. “Some of the earliest memories I have are of Jen starting junior school back in 1943 - I remember having to tie her shoelaces up,” laughs Mick. “During the war when there was an air raid, the four youngest siblings, including Jen and I, would sleep together under the stairs. It was a tight squeeze, but we made it work.”
Jen adds: “We were never a well-off family in terms of money, but we were well-off in love – and that’s reflected in mine and Mick’s relationship now. Together we sit and reminisce about the good old days, like when we went ballroom dancing of a Saturday night.”
Fast forward, both Jen and Mick are continuing to make new memories together at Ridgeway Court, where they say the community spirit is second to none. Jen explains: “I’ve always cherished good company, so it’s great that there are so many people you can talk to at the development – it’s one of the things that persuaded me to move here. Not to mention, there’s always some kind of event or activity happening. I particularly enjoy when we play Beetle Drive, which until recently, I hadn’t played since I was at school.”
Mick adds: “I think it’s important that you make the most of life at the development, so I try and get stuck in where I can. There are regular quiz nights, as well as fish and chip lunches which I help to organise, and if you have any hobbies, there’s plenty of opportunity to pursue them.
“There’s never a dull moment, especially with Jen around. For Christmas, she joined my wife, Lynda, and I for dinner, and together, we felt right at home.”
Mick concludes: “Jen and I are incredibly lucky to have shared some truly special times over the years, from being the photographer at her and John’s wedding to helping her start a new chapter here at Ridgeway Court.
“I’m a strong believer that you control your own future, which is why when you’re down, you have to pick yourself back up and make the best of life with those around you.”
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